Posted on April 8th, 2013 No comments
Morning Mojo ~ “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~ People tend to carry the baggage of many yesterdays with them through life. That baggage can be so hard to carry and wear you down over time. Drop that baggage where you are and move forward unencumbered. Know that it no longer serves you and free yourself today. Fill your day with Love, Life and Laughter!!
Posted on February 24th, 2013 No comments
Extremely successful entrepreneurs think and do things differently than everyone else. Below is a list of six of those things, and if you want to achieve an extraordinary level of success, you must do the same things.
1. They have forward-thinking mindsets.
You can be a successful entrepreneur by looking at existing products or services and creating superior products. However, super successful entrepreneurs are innovators. They examine where industries are going and they get out ahead of them.
A great example is the iPhone. Steve Jobs was a true forward-thinker, and that is how he changed the entire mobile industry and grew Apple to the most valuable company in the world.
2. They set lofty, seemingly unrealistic goals.
You are much more likely to build a successful business if you have a set of goals to drive you than if you don’t have clear goals.
But, you are more likely to build an extremely successful business if your goals are so big and exciting that you will run through brick walls to achieve them.
Your level of effort will be commensurate with the potential payoff of achieving your goals.
3. They don’t make contingency plans.
Always have a back-up plan. How many times have you heard that advice? Sure, having a back-up plan can give you a little more peace of mind. The problem is that the back-up plan is too often used as an easy way out when the going gets tough.
The fact is that you will work much harder with more persistence and determination if you know that you don’t have a safety net.
However, you must trust that if things don’t work out perfectly, you will bounce back. You will be just fine. Work hard, learn from mistakes, and persist.
4. They roll up their sleeves and work.
Whenever you see or hear about an extremely successful person, remember one thing: that person has paid the price through many, many hours of effort to reach his or her position.
Truth be told, some people do manage to get very lucky and become successful with relative ease. All the stars align perfectly and things work out well. A talent scout discovered Tyson Beckford while he was hanging out at a park. One year later he was modeling for Ralph Lauren.
Situations like this are very rare, and it would be a huge mistake to believe that you will be one of those rare exceptions to the rule. Be prepared to put forth some real effort for many months (or years) before you achieve a remarkable level of success.
5. They know how to sell.
Go out and ask a handful of successful business owners what one skill contributed the most to their success, and most of them will tell you it is the ability to sell.
Selling is not just limited to product sales. Selling is
• explaining why a particular decision or position makes sense,
• convincing others to collaborate with you,
• overcoming objections,
• knowing how to negotiate, and
• Having the ability to effectively communicate with different types of people.
6. They don’t believe in failure.
There is no such thing as failure in the eyes of extremely successful people; there are only results.
If they try something that doesn’t work out, they extract the lessons from the experience, add it to their bank of knowledge, and persist until they achieve the desired results.
Posted on January 31st, 2013 No comments
Find Your Way! Kris Kristofferson wrote this song while living in a run-down tenement in Nashville and while he was working as a janitor for Columbia Records. He was told that he was not to solicit any of his songs to other artist or he would be fired. Kris Kristofferson new he needed to get the attention of the artist in a unique way and that is just what he did. Kris delivered his song personally to Johnny Cash. He did that by landing his National Guard helicopter in Cash’s front yard. He took a song and a burning desire to get it published and recorded and did the best thing he could think of to get Cash’s attention. This song was #1 on the Country charts for 2 weeks in September 1970 If you like the song or not makes little difference…..the idea of pushing forward and getting your ideas out there in a unique way does. Find Your Way! Lane Resources Inc. © 2013
Posted on November 21st, 2011 No comments
Confidence: Get It and Keep It
Having confidence is a huge advantage in careers, life, and relationships. It’s the key to attracting the right job, the right people, the right decisions from others, and getting what we want.
Like money, everyone wants more confidence. Some people naturally seem to have it; perhaps they were lucky and had the right kind of parenting. In any case, knowing a few strategies for improving our self-confidence will ensure that we can tap into its power.
Everyone has a baseline of confidence. Some people have unshakable confidence built upon strong foundations; others find their confidence level is a bit shaky when faced with mistakes, criticisms and failures.
Confidence is closely tied with our sense of self-esteem. Self-esteem enables us to experience ourselves not only accurately but gladly. It’s a realistic, appreciative opinion; we are able to be honest about our strengths, weaknesses and everything in between, and still feel good about who we are.
There is a difference between the outer appearance of confidence and deeply felt intrinsic self-worth. True self esteem is steady; it doesn’t lead to complacency or overconfidence, but rather is a strong motivator to work hard.
Studies have shown that self-esteem is universal: it is important not only in Western Cultures, but is related to mental health and happiness in diverse cultures including Asia and the Middle East.
Foundations of Self-Esteem
According to Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D, author of 10 Simple Solutions for Building Self-Esteem, self-esteem is built from three factors: unconditional worth, unconditional love and growth.
- 1. Unconditional Worth
This means that one’s worth isn’t increased or diminished by external factors, but is based on our true value as a human being. This can be confusing to people who have learned they must achieve and acquire in order to be considered worthy.
Once we believe in our intrinsic worth, we are relieved of the need to judge ourselves and others, or compare and compete on external values and factors. We can choose to value our own innate capacities and see the many ways we contribute to the well-being of ourselves and others.
- 2. Unconditional Love
Abraham Maslow noted that psychological health is not possible without love for the essential core. Even those who have not experienced unconditional love from parents can learn to provide love to themselves and others. Love helps us experience our worth, feel satisfaction, and enjoy growth and life.
- 3. Growth
We feel better about ourselves when we are living constructively, learning, making decisions, developing and growing. Growing does not change our core worth, but it helps us experience it with greater satisfaction.
In summary, self-esteem is a sense of satisfaction that comes from recognizing and appreciating our intrinsic worth; it encourages us to choose to love and grow. It’s not based upon comparing and competing. We can enhance and enjoy our sense of self worth through learning, growing, achievements and goals.
How We Lose Confidence
Young children do not appear to experience self-dislike. As we mature, however, we learn to over-think. We judge, compare, criticize, worry, blame, and obsess about faults. We want what we don’t have, and we forget to appreciate what we do have.
We lose patience with ourselves and others, and don’t accept things as they are. As we lose self-compassion, we also lose our compassion for others. As adults we become highly judgmental, and may even prize judgment as the quality of discernment.
As a result, we become overly critical. We apply a negative eye to ourselves and that erodes our sense of intrinsic value and self worth. Unreasonable negative thoughts intrude into our minds and forming background chatter that drowns out appreciation and enjoyment.
Getting Rid of Negativity
Without doubt, our own critical nature eats away at our confidence more than any outside judgment, mistake or failure. Over-active negative mind chatter can cause us to react defensively in neutral situations.
Many of these habits of thinking are learned and can be unlearned. Forget about blaming parents, teachers, and people who didn’t like us when we were growing up. No matter what happened to us or how we ended up with negative reactions, we can learn to disconnect from harmful automatic thoughts.
We can replace negative thoughts with positive ones that will make us more effective, happier, and self-confident. Ultimately we are responsible for the thoughts we choose. We can’t control many things in life, but we can control our thoughts.
Here are a few of the distortions that show up in negative mind chatter:
All-or-nothing thinking Labeling Over generalizing Assuming Emotional reasoning Ruminating Unfavorable comparing Shoulds, oughts, must Catastrophizing Personalizing Blaming
We lose confidence when we apply negative thinking to ourselves or other people. No one escapes these intrusive thought patterns. The key is to become aware of them. Once we catch ourselves engaging in automatic distortions, we can re-think, reframe, and revise our thoughts.
For example, we might be thinking, “I can’t possibly get this done in time. I’m too slow in the mornings. My brain doesn’t work that way.”
We can reframe the self-talk like this: “I don’t like having to work in a hurry, especially so early. I’m not sure I can finish, but at least I can start. Maybe my brain will wake up after a few stabs at it.”
By acknowledging the reality, we avoid catastrophizing and assuming, and we agree to do what is possible by starting.
When we look at what we can do, instead of what’s wrong, we give ourselves a chance to succeed and grow from the experience. When we guard against distortions and negativity, our confidence grows instead of withers. Our minds start to acquire more positive thinking habits. We set ourselves up for success and build self-confidence.
- 1. Unconditional Worth
Posted on October 10th, 2011 No comments
Being a rescuer is a common automatic response that many people find themselves naturally falling into. It is an emotional state of mind where a person wants to help others, sometimes to the point of where they neglect caring for their own personal and financial needs. Being a rescuer consists of helping others because of the internal satisfaction gained by feeling needed and important.
Human nature expects, and demands, that when a person is in need of help that a friend or family member step up and lend a helping hand. A rescuer fills this need because it offers satisfaction for themselves and help to the ones in need. The request for assistance can be financial or emotional support, or some type of physical task that needs to be completed. No matter what is called for, though, a rescuer will allows jump to the rescue of the person in need.
There are numerous downfalls associated with a person that is a natural rescuer. They will, nine out of ten times, sacrifice their own personal finances, well-being, or lifestyle in order to help others. Many people that put others before themselves have to cope with living a simple life that is full of choices made by the people around them.
The second most prominent downfall that can befall a rescuer can be linked to the problem discussed above. Once people realize that a rescuer is present they will take full advantage of it. More often than not a person that helps others will be used to accomplish as many tasks as possible, even simple ones such as running to the store in the middle of the night. No task is too small, or big, to tackle in order for them to fulfill their own inner demands.
Being a rescuer is an emotional need that many people throughout the world can be categorized into. It is a natural response to any situation that may arise pertaining to the wants and needs of friends and family members. It is an emotional state that requires the rescuer to help people in order for them to feel needed, making them fulfill the internal requirements of being important and loved. Even though stepping up and helping people is a natural, commonly automatic, act for a rescuer, it is possible to limit the negative effects associated with the actions. Basically, people that are rescuers need to learn how to say “no”, and to realize that it is necessary to prioritize their lives by putting themselves before others.
Lane Resources Inc.
R. Lynn Lane
Posted on September 15th, 2011 No comments
Life Lessons from Winnie the Pooh
Several generations have grown up on the tales of Winnie the Pooh and his friends from the Hundred Acre Wood. Since the loveable Pooh Bear was first introduced to the world in 1924 by writer A.A. Milne, stories of the ragtag gang have captivated the hearts and imaginations of millions.
Rarely does a child—or and adult, for that matter—read or watch a Winnie the Pooh story without coming across a moral lesson. Four of the life lessons that permeate throughout the franchise are:
1. Optimism is better than pessimism.
Contrast the adorable yet morose attitude of Eeyore with the ever-upbeat attitude of Winnie. While Eeyore always focuses intensely on the cloud, Pooh always seems to find the silver lining. Pooh and the others seem to tolerate Eeyore’s pessimism, but it is clear that the better approach to life is the optimistic one.
2. True friends are always loyal, even if it costs.
Winnie and his friends frequently overcome their fears in order to rescue one who is lost or in danger. They are even willing to set aside personal agendas and desires for the sake of the one who is in trouble, such as when Pooh set aside his search for honey in order to rescue Christopher Robin from the dreaded Backson. In so doing, the Hundred Acre Wood residents demonstrate true friendship to us.
3. Expect the best in each other.
Piglet, Winnie’s timid friend, often finds strength in the encouragement he receives from Pooh. Even when the others express doubts about another’s abilities or intentions, Pooh remains positive. Similarly, when we expect the best in someone else, often that person will rise to the occasion. As a bonus, positive expectations can also lead to less stress and fewer interpersonal conflicts.
4. Have an unquenchable hunger for more.
Fans of Winnie know that the one thing that occupies most of Pooh’s time and energy is his never-ending quest for honey. He has an insatiable thirst for the sweet nectar. Likewise, we can have an insatiable desire to grow beyond where we are right now. We can have a healthy hunger to grow personally, professionally, relationally, intellectually, and spiritually.
These and other lessons expressed through the Winnie the Pooh series of books and videos can enrich the life of a young child as well as a seasoned parent. Winnie the Pooh and his friends may reside in a fantasy world, but they teach us valuable lessons for living in the real world.
Lane Resources (c) 2011